Being a Bookworm Mama - By Hannah Ens

Nothing destroys a reading habit quite like having a baby. Between the sleepless nights, full hands, low energy and complete lack of free time, the arrival of a newborn can tank the TBR of even the most dedicated bookworm. If you’re like me, and reading was previously a near-constant source of entertainment, the loss of the hobby can be quite the blow on top of an already challenging transition. 

I don’t mean reading to your child, though the benefits to that are well-documented, from language development and empathy to parent-child bonding. We’ve been reading to my son since he was born in the summer of 2020 (and have three years of the LMSS summer reading challenge under our belts!). It has been a joy to see him laugh at stories I grew up with and discover new favorite characters together. Reading to my future child was something I dreamed about before I was even ready to be a mother; my mom and I have been building a children’s book collection since I was a teen. 

Reading for myself was harder to regain. But it's something that has always been important to me and finding a way to work it back into my life as a mom has been extraordinarily beneficial to my overall happiness and sense of self. Really, this can be applied to any hobby that gets back-burnered to make way for the nonstop demands of parenting. The personal activities that bring us joy remind us that we have a name other than Mom or Dad, and that while life as a parent is uniquely demanding, we don’t have to lose ourselves within it. 

I have found that when I make even a little bit of time for my hobbies, of which reading is my favorite, I am a better mom. When I do something positive for myself in my limited off-hours, I am happier and more present during the on-hours. It helps break the cycle of fantasizing about the freedom of bedtime, only to squander it with brain-dead phone scrolling, which sends me to bed feeling dully apathetic. Not a great way to head into another full day of Mom Mode.   

If reading is a joy you’ve been missing in your life, try these tips to sink back into a good book! But I think the core of it – looking for a method that works for your current phase of life – can be applied to any hobby. Think creatively about how you can reconnect with an activity that brings you delight, even if it doesn’t look exactly the same as before. 

Change Up the Format 

Before becoming a mom, I read almost exclusively in print. I was the kid who would haul ten hardbacks on a road trip just in case. That pivoted in a major once I was up nursing at all hours of the night. I started adding audiobooks to my nighttime entertainment, along with copious amounts of Netflix and shopping Facebook marketplace at 3 a.m. 

Audiobooks have the advantage of being hands-free and they can go wherever your phone goes thanks to apps like Libby and Hoopla, which many libraries offer free access to. Set it to the side and when your baby has a spit-up explosion, the story will chug along safely out of the splash zone. Audiobooks won’t strain your eyes in the wee hours of the morning, and if you happen to doze off while it plays, just rewind until something sounds vaguely familiar.   

I’m thankfully past those newborn all-nighters, but I’ve kept up the listening habit. These days that mostly happens after toddler bedtime, since my son, who cannot hear me when I ask him to get his shoes, would be guaranteed to suddenly start listening keenly and repeat something inappropriate. Of the 51 books I’ve finished so far this year, 40 have been audio, and they’re great for multitasking in both fun and serious ways. I can read while simultaneously indulging in my crafting hobbies like crochet and cross-stitch. Or on less exciting occasions, folding laundry or picking up the fifty thousand toys scattered around the house. 

Ebooks offer some similar advantages, like portability and often free access from a local library. They're a good silent option if you don’t want to deal with a print book or headphones, like if you’re nap trapped, have time to kill during a dance class, or need to keep an ear out for a kitchen timer. Many reading apps have a dark screen mode, which is useful for low-light nighttime settings while you feed or rock a baby. For me, the ebook struggle is not getting sucked back into social media instead of reading. Holding a phone to read literally puts the distractions a lot closer to hand, so if you go this route, stick to the book! 

Change up the Genre 

I have always been a fantasy and science fiction fan, but when my son was born, those were no longer the best choice for me. They were often longer, denser, and with weightier and more intricate plots than I cared to keep track of while nursing in the dead of night. So for a few months, my Goodreads was nothing but rom-coms. Something funny and lighthearted with a guaranteed happy ending was ideal for the midnight hours when my brain was functioning at 30%. As I've gotten more used to listening to audiobooks, I've been able to better follow along with all kinds of genres.  

A genre swap might be just the thing to jump start your interest and keep you coming back for more. Cackle with newfound appreciation over a humorous parenting memoir. Puzzle out whodunnit with a cozy mystery. Admire the blend of art and story in a graphic novel.  Learn something crazy about history with an intriguing nonfiction selection. 

Revisit Old Favorites 

If you want a little something to stimulate your adult brain but don’t feel ready to commit to a brand-new book, try an old favorite! This could be an adult book you’ve previously enjoyed, or dive back into something from your childhood. This way, if you get distracted or happen to doze off during a listening session, you won’t have totally lost the plot. 

Don’t Be Afraid to DNF 

I used to never DNF (did not finish) a book. Now I say life’s too short to keep struggling through a book that’s not working for you. For most readers, it’s a hobby - it's supposed to be enjoyable! The less you enjoy a book, the less likely you’ll be to pick it up during your limited free time, which just prolongs your pain. When I feel ambivalent about a book, I’ve struggled to finish 12-hour audiobooks during a 14-day library checkout. But on the flip side, I’ve blazed through 20-hour books I loved with time to spare. There’s no trophy for finishing a book that’s dragging you down. 

Epilogue  

I hope this inspires someone to pick up a book that's just for them. Whether it's a thoughtful memoir, spine-tingling thriller, swoony romance or sweeping fantasy, I hope it gives you an escape, a laugh, an idea, or simply the satisfaction of experiencing a new story. Let your children see that you love reading. Let them handle your books (within reason) and surprise you by sticking in random bookmarks you'll discover later. Let them drop the "mommy books" into the library return so they learn that this can be a pastime for a lifetime. Even if a few pages a day is all you can fit in, there's no time like today to start a new chapter in your reading life! So bookworm mamas, what are you reading next?